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The Winds of Change

  • Posted on August 29, 2010 at 3:12 pm

As I sit here beneath the blues and whites and grays of another beautiful Sedona sky, I close my eyes and feel the freshness of a new wind blowing across my face and thru my hair.  I hear the rustle of leaves as this new wind caresses the trees around me.  I continue to listen and I hear a faint whisper in my ear, “I am the winds of change.  Feel me. Allow me to refresh you.  Breathe me in and know that all is well.” 

I take a breath so deep that it touches the very core of who I am.  I exhale and my body actually begins to feel lighter as the heaviness of all that concerns me dissipates and leaves me. I am overcome with complete and total peace. I am reminded of who I AM…and I know. 

Change is in the air.  It is all around us.  Let us breathe it in and allow it to remind us of who we really are.  Let us all be at peace and know that our best days are indeed ahead of us.

~D~

Photo:  Sedona, AZ ~ August 29, 2010

Copyright 2010 – Denise Gilreath ©

Forever in Relationship

  • Posted on August 8, 2010 at 10:17 am

Forever in Relationship is something that I have struggled with for awhile now.  My Heart and my head have had major battles over the topic. Having been married twice, I promised Forever twice.  Both marriages ended in divorce.  I have since had other relationships in which a promise of Forever was discussed, but those have also ended. Was a Forever Relationship really mine to promise?  Was it fear that kept me from promising Forever again?  Or was it fear that wanted a Forever promise?

I asked Spirit to shine a light on Forever and help me understand what it means for me on my path.  Without sleep, I sat in the silence for hours and waited for my Truth to be illuminated.  As the light of understanding began to come forth, I was reminded that I AM a Spiritual BEing having a Human Experience.  I AM Love; born out of Love, into Love to BE Love.  Love is the only thing that ever was, ever is or ever will be. I AM Forever…my Human Experience is not. 

Love is the only constant. It is unconditional. There is nothing that will change what Love truly is. Relationships are conditional. They change based on circumstances, choices, personal growth, etc. My mind has tried to tell me that the two are the same, but Spirit has shown me that my Heart knows the difference. I can promise to Love Forever, because that is who I AM.  I can promise to BE in Relationship right now in this moment, because Now is all that I have. I can not promise Forever in a Relationship, because it is not mine to promise.

It is my belief that as Humans, we want promises of Forever in Relationship because we are afraid. We are afraid of ourselves, we are afraid of our past, we are afraid of being alone, we are afraid of the unknown, we are afraid to trust, we are afraid to allow, we are just afraid…period. When we ask for or make a commitment of Forever in Relationship we do it out of fear. By doing so, we step out of the free flow of Love that comes from the Heart and we cross over into the control that the mind craves.  The mind tells us that this control will calm our fears…and it does for a while. It calms them by burying them deeply beneath empty promises of Forever Relationships.

When we were born into this life experience, we did not know fear.  We only knew Love. We craved it and accepted it from wherever and whomever it came.  We lived from our Hearts, We lived in the Now. I am hungry, I will eat. I am sleepy, I will sleep. I am Love, I Love you. As our minds began to develop and become conditioned to our Humanness, we were slowly introduced to fear.  Because of this fear, we allowed the voice in our head to drown out the voice in our Heart.  I am hungry, but it is not meal time.  I am sleepy but it is not dark outside.  I Love you, but you do not love me.

As a result of conditioning, relationships have become more about control than about Love.  Marriage is a perfect example of this. In my opinion, it is a legal arrangement that is meant to “protect” and “control” the parameters of the relationship.  It dictates what is acceptable behavior for those involved.  As I stated earlier, I have been married and divorced twice. I no longer believe in the institution of marriage.  I do acknowledge that there are those individuals who truly feel that marriage is right for them, but it isn’t right for me. I do not fear commitment. I just don’t believe that I AM to commit myself and my life to another person in such a way as to limit my Life Experience. The freedom to follow my Heart is my birthright.  For me, marriage is a forfiet of that birthright.  I have been there and done that. I have no desire be legally bound to a person or a relationship. If my heart says go, I want the freedom to do so.
 
I do believe in relationships.  I want relationships.  I want an intimate relationship with someone special. Spirit has told me that I am not to walk this path alone.  But that doesn’t mean that I am to make an empty promise of Forever. It means that I AM to follow my heart. I AM to walk the path of my Life Experience in the Forever Love that I AM and share that Forever Love with those who walk with me.  I AM to recognize and honor divine connections. I AM to allow Relationships to grow and BEcome. I AM to accept relationships as they are now and as they will BE. I AM to do this by Loving those I AM in relationship with unconditionally; without demands, expectations, judgments or fear.   I AM to allow them to BE all that they can BE.

My view of Forever extends far beyond the realtionships in my current Life Experience.  With that being said, if I AM blessed with a realtionship that lasts for the remainder of this Life Experience, it will not be because I entered into a binding agreement or made a Forever promise out of fear. It will BE because I followed my Heart and allowed the beauty of the divine connection to unfold. 

~D~

Photo:  Our Southern California Garden ~ May 2010 
Copyright 2010 – Denise Gilreath ©

The Stupa and The Medicine Wheel

  • Posted on July 31, 2010 at 3:01 pm

Early this morning, we went to the Amitabha Stupa here in Sedona.  A Stupa is a structure that represents the physical embodiment of the Buddha’s enlightened mind. Stupas are a rarity in the west and we are blessed to have one literally within walking distance of our home.  The Stupa here is graced with a bronze image of Amitabha, the Buddha of Limitless Light. It is filled with sacred relics, ritual objects and hundreds of millions of prayers for peace.  We left the road and began the short hike up a well worn dirt pathway.  As we approached the Stupa, I felt a sense of reverence for the sacred ground upon which I walked.  As is Buddhist custom, we circumambulated the Stupa three times.  We stood in silent meditation for a few moments and then left an offering.  We followed the dirt path up the hill to a beautiful wooden statue of Buddha. Again, we circumambulated the statue and stood momentarily in silent reverence and meditation. 

We continued to walk up the hill, off the beaten path and came to a medicine wheel.  Medicine wheels were originally constructed by Indigenous people and are representative of their belief in the “never-ending cycle of life.” It has no beginning and no end. Tribal healers and holy men regard the circle as sacred and have always used it in their ceremonies. Though this medicine wheel sits on the same ground as the Stupa, it is not considered to be a part of it and is therefore, not maintained.  Grass and weeds were growing in the center of the wheel and around the rocks that formed the sacred circle.  We entered and walked around the wheel several times. As I walked, I became very aware of my surroundings; the ground beneath my feet, the sky above me, the plants, the trees, and the beauty of the red rocks.  I sat down and closed my eyes.  I could hear rhythmic chanting coming from the Stupa.  The voices of the Buddhist visitors down the hill joined quite harmoniously with the songs being sung by birds somewhere nearby.  A gentle breeze blew across my face and thru my hair. I felt it was an invitation from Spirit to go within and listen.  As I sat there in my silence and heard what Spirit had to say, I could feel the healing energies of the medicine wheel rising up from within and all around me. My heart knew and recognized the sacredness of this place.  A gentle rain began to fall. As the drops of cool water fell upon my skin, I was brought back to the awareness of my surroundings.  I took a deep breath and opened my eyes. I stood up and exited the medicine wheel. I walked away with a true sense of renewal and enlightenment. I AM grateful.

~D~

 

Photo 1:  Amitabha Stupa, Sedona, AZ ~ July 2010
Photo 2:  Wooden Buddha at Stupa, Sedona, AZ ~ July 2010
Photo 3:  Medicine Wheel at Stupa, Sedona, AZ ~ July 2010
Copyright 2010 – Denise Gilreath ©

Loving Unconditionally

  • Posted on July 11, 2010 at 6:36 am
As I continue to grow in the Love that I AM and as more of my Authentic Self emerges, I realize that my definition of Unconditional Love is changing. I once believed that Unconditional Love simply meant that there was nothing a person could do or say that would make me stop loving them. And although that is a very important facet of Unconditional Love, I have realized that it doesn’t stop there. Of course, to Love Unconditionally means to Love without condition, but it also means to Love without demands, expectations, judgments or fear. Loving Unconditionally means Loving Openly; with an Open Heart, an Open Mind and with Open Hands.

Unconditional Love is a Safe Harbor in which our Authentic Selves can feel the freedom to not only emerge, but to thrive. I believe that we must first feel this Unconditional Love for ourselves before we can truly feel it for another. Once we Love ourselves Unconditionally and once we recognize the Peace and Equanimity that comes with it, we can become a Safe Harbor for others by Loving them Openly. To me, this means Loving them in such a way that they feel no pressure to be something that they are not. It means building no walls, having no chains and drawing no lines. It means giving them room to spread their wings. Sometimes, along with the spreading of their wings, those we Love will find that they must fly away in order to be true to who they have BEcome. Loving Unconditionally means allowing them the freedom to fly and feeling nothing but happiness in their flight.

BE a Safe Harbor…Love Yourself…and Love Others…Unconditionally.

~D~

Photo: Huntington Beach, CA ~ February 2010
Copyright 2010 – Denise Gilreath ©

Turtle Love

  • Posted on May 19, 2010 at 7:58 am

Turtles have always fascinated me.  I became an avid collector of all things turtle at a very young age.  As a little girl, I noticed turtles everywhere.  Growing up in a rural Georgia home, I would often find a small turtle in the middle of the road or at the edge of the woods.  I would bring it home and put it in a box and feed it and love it, until my mother would tell me it was time to set it free. My friends and family couldn’t help but be aware of my love for turtles.  My best friend’s mom once made me a snuggly blue turtle pillow that I slept with for years.  I named him Elton…after Elton John…enough said.  I received a turtle cookie jar as a gift when I was eighteen; it sits on a shelf in my bedroom today.  My brother gave me a very large stuffed turtle one year for my birthday.  He bought it at one of those road side stands that sell the velvet Elvis paintings.  Her name was Myrtle.  She had a big smile, long eyelashes, an orange belly and a lavender body with purple flowers on her shell. She was the perfect centerpiece for my bed.  She eventually sustained a broken neck as a result of my many tearful teenage hugs. My daughter has her now and she resides in an attic.  I am certain she still wears that big smile, even with her broken neck. I continued to collect turtles until I was in my mid twenties. I guess at that time I was just so busy with life that, even though I didn’t lose my love for them,  I did lose my passion for collecting them. So, one day, I put my turtles in a box, closed the lid and packed them away.  I have no idea where they are now.

Sometime early last year, while rummaging thru my old hope chest, I came across a small box.  Inside were three turtle pendants. They had been hiding there since I was a teenager.  They were saved from being packed away with all the other turtles. Holding those pendants in my hand, I could feel my love for turtles rising up within me.  I was being reminded of why these magnificent creatures have always fascinated me so.  Turtles have appeared to me many times since I re-discovered those keepsakes.  For the first time in years, I have noticed them along side the road or crossing in front of my vehicle.  I have even seen desert tortoises for sale at flea markets.  Last summer, I came across a baby sea turtle on a beach in Florida. The little one had perished before it could make its way to the water.  My friend and I placed it in a large sea shell, said a prayer and gave it to back to the ocean. Recently, I looked up from my computer and there was a large beautiful sea turtle on the television.  It was a documentary on the travels of the Loggerhead.  Just last week, I bought the first turtle pendant of my new collection. It now hangs from the rearview mirror in my truck along side my wooden peace sign. It seems so natural for them to be hanging there together. I feel joy when I look at them. 

A few months ago, I moved to southern California and I was very pleased to learn that a box turtle named Speedy, lives amongst the trees and bushes in our backyard.  In the past, he has proven to be very illusive, having been seen only twice in the two years prior to my arrival.  Last month, I was blessed with meeting Speedy for the first time.  He emerged from his hiding place early one morning and slowly made his way around the backyard, stopping to munch on a myriad of leaves and berries.  I watched him do this for several days before he went back into hiding.  He has appeared at least once a week since our first meeting.  He seems to be losing a bit of his illusiveness, though he is still quick to withdraw into his shell if I get too close. 

It is my belief that everything happens for a reason.  There was a reason that I was so drawn to turtles as a child and there is a reason that turtles have come back into my life.  I realize now that the Turtle is a Life Long Spirit Totem for me.  I do have other Spirit Totems.  The Crow/Raven and the Hawk are the most prevalent. But it is the turtle that has been with me for the longest time.  The turtle is the oldest known symbol for earth; the keeper of doors. It teaches us to be well grounded and to honor the creative source within us. I feel that the following excerpt from the book Animal-Speak by Ted Andrews applies to me and my life long connection to the Turtle.

If you are drawn to turtles in your life, it is time to get connected to your most primal essence. Go within your shell and come out when your ideas are ready to be expressed. It is time to recognize that there is abundance out there for you. It doesn’t have to be gotten quickly and immediately. Take your time and let the natural flow work for you; too much, too soon can upset the balance. Turtle reminds us that all we need for all that we do is available to us, if we approach it in the right manner and time.”

“Turtles remind us that the way to heaven is through the earth. In Mother Earth is all that we need. She will care for us, protect us, and nurture us, as long as we do the same for her. For that to happen, we must slow down and heighten our sensibilities. We must see our connection to all things. Just as the turtle cannot separate itself from its shell, neither can we separate ourselves from the Earth.

With all that being said, I believe that my love and my passion for turtles exist because I can relate to them so well.  So much of who I AM and who I have always been is reflected in the turtle. Just like a turtle, I have always had the tendency to withdraw into my shell when I was afraid or when I needed to escape from the world around me.  As a child, I was often confused and afraid.  But in my shell, life was easier.  From the safety of that shell I could peek out whenever I wanted and then retreat back into my hiding place at the first sign of trouble.  Throughout my life, I have spent a lot of time in that shell, learning and growing and waiting.   But the time has come for me to leave my hiding place.  It is time for me to “stick my neck” out and BE who I AM.  It is time to speak my own truth.  I now know that I can do that without fear, without confusion and without pain.  Just like Speedy, it is time for me to fully emerge from my shell and truly enjoy Mother Earth’s backyard.  

~D~ 

Photo:  Speedy ~ The Turtle that shares our Backyard ~ April 2010
Copyright 2010 – Denise Gilreath ©

Wings

  • Posted on May 8, 2010 at 10:13 am

I look at this picture and I recall the moment in time that I have captured with my camera.  I consider the beauty of it and what it represents to me. In my time of reflection, I become so aware that, just like these seagulls, each of us is different; we look different, we sound different and so on. But deep down inside, we are all the same. We each have our own personal journey, yet we do journey along side one another.  The face of our attention may be pointed in different directions, but it is my belief that each of us feels the need to rise and fly at some point during our life experience. 

We all have wings; some of us still haven’t found them; some of us are aware we have wings, but have not yet figured out what to do with them.  There are those who are just learning to spread their wings but have not quite made it off the ground.  Some are beginning to flap their wings and are finally beginning to rise.  Then there are those of us who are flying so high, that soaring on the wind is what comes naturally.

It is the wind of Love that makes it possible for us to use the wings that we have been given.  Each of us has a choice.  We can choose to stay on the ground and never acknowledge that we have wings…or…we can choose to rise, by allowing Love to be the gentle wind beneath our wings that causes us to not only fly…but to soar. 

Won’t you come fly with me?

~D~

Photo:  Zuma Beach, Malibu, CA ~ April 2010
Copyright 2010 – Denise Gilreath ©

Day Journey to the Ocean

  • Posted on April 28, 2010 at 4:27 pm

For both my boyfriend and I, being at the ocean is where we feel most at home.  The spirit of the ocean constantly tugs at our hearts and has for years. We are very spiritual people.  Our deep spirituality is what brought us into each other’s lives and it is on that strong foundation that our relationship is being built. When he told me recently that he felt the need to spend the day at the ocean, I was very eager to join him.  We both knew that Spirit had something really special in store for us. So, with camera in hand, we jumped into the truck and we were on our way.  We reached the Pacific Coast Highway at Malibu. We turned right and our beach hopping, day journey began.

I must say that it was truly an amazing day.  Being at the ocean always stimulates and inspires us, but this day was extraordinary. We experienced many things that spoke to us very deeply. We were so aware of the life that surrounded us. The trees were lush and green. Colorful flowers were in bloom everywhere. Squirrels were sitting on the rocks along the roadside looking out toward the ocean, seemingly mesmerized by the rhythm of its waves.   Ladybugs were resting on colorful pebbles scattered across the sand.  Pelicans were en masse, soaring thru the skies and then suddenly diving into the salty water for their daily dose of fish.  We walked the beaches along side seagulls, and sandpipers and egrets.  We felt the sand between our toes and the cool sea spray upon our skin.  We watched dolphins rise and fall with the waves as they passed by very close to the shoreline. The crows, who have become our daily companions, were with us every mile of the way. At one point we even saw one sitting on the rocks along side the squirrels.  We stopped to have lunch and they sat on the light post and in the palm tree just outside the restaurant, waiting for us to continue our journey. 

We found many feathers thru out the day, which we believe add positive energy to any journey. At several different beaches along the way, we saw stacked rocks or cairn as they are called by some.  I couldn’t help but linger near them. Their energy was awesome. We visited one beach that was completely littered with stones and pebbles of all different shapes, sizes and colors.  The energy I felt there was almost indescribable.  I had never before seen so much natural color on the beach. Earth tone hues of greens, blues, reds, yellows, oranges and purples; it was like a rainbow colored landscape with grays, and blacks and whites thrown in for contrast.  The waves would roll in and cover the stones, then out again, leaving behind its bubbly white foam which would fill in the spaces between the stones. The beige color of the sand, scattered bits of brownish green seaweed and various colored seashells completed the picture.  I can’t remember when I have felt more grounded. 

Our northward trek ended at Santa Barbara.  It was there that we turned around and headed south, back toward Malibu, arriving just in time to watch the sun set.  During our drive inland we talked about the things that Spirit had shown us thru out the day.  Then, we sat in silence as we attempted to absorb the beauty of the many gifts we had just been given.  A big, bright, round moon lit up the night sky.   It was the perfect ending to an absolutely awesome day.

~D~

Photo:  Somewhere along the Pacific Coast Hwy, Southern CA ~ April 2010
Copyright 2010 – Denise Gilreath ©

Connecting the Dots

  • Posted on April 17, 2010 at 1:50 pm

Art by Hudson ~ My 14 month old Grandson. No pre-made Lines...no Dots to Connect yet. Just lots of Beautiful Color Flowing Freely from the Heart and thru the Hand of a Child. ღ

One of my favorite things to do as a child was color.  I really loved my coloring books.  I would search and search thru my supply of crayons until I found just the perfect colors for my next masterpiece. I was always so very careful not to color outside the pre-made lines because that would just be “wrong”.  But I would trace those big black bold lines with whatever color I was using in an effort to cover them up. I remember each time I got a new coloring book, the first thing I would do is search out every “connect the dot” page there was and I would do those first.  I couldn’t wait to see what picture would emerge from the dots I connected.

The thing that bothered me about those dots though, was that if I connected each one with a straight line, the picture would come out looking square and really unnatural.  So, I would curve my lines a bit in an effort to make the picture look more life-like and then I would fill in the picture with lots of beautiful color.  

Lately, I have been so aware that my life has been a series of dots.  I AM learning to connect those dots and the more I connect, the more colorful my picture becomes.  I AM also noticing that even though there are a few straight lines, the space between the dots mostly consists of curves and circles and highs and lows.  It is the combination of all these that outline my life and make it uniquely my own. There are no pre-made lines that define me; no big black bold lines that I can’t go outside of for fear of being “wrong.”  My life is a beautiful picture that is in a constant state of BEing created. Its colors are bright and bold and ever changing. I AM my own Masterpiece in the making.
~D~ 

Copyright 2010 – Denise Gilreath ©

Hidden Treasures

  • Posted on March 31, 2010 at 3:56 pm

I feel as though I should take an afternoon nap, so I go upstairs and lie down across the bed.  There is a warm breeze caressing my skin as it blows gently into the bedroom thru the open widow.  The birds are singing a joyful song of gratitude for the gift of beautiful sunshine and clear skies in which to fly.  Off in the distance, I can hear the sound of an ice cream truck as it slowly makes its way thru the streets of our neighborhood. It is as if the birds are singing in perfect harmony with the joyful music emanating from the moving sweet shop.  I continue to listen and hear the sound of a lawn mower coming from somewhere nearby.  As I begin to take in all that I am hearing and feeling, I suddenly get a whiff of freshly mown grass.  It reminds me of summertime as a small child.   

For as far back as I can remember, summer has been my favorite time of year.  As much as I loved school, I was so excited when summer break arrived.  I would wake each morning, anxious to go outside and play.  I would hurriedly get dressed, eat a few bites of breakfast and if there were any chores that just “had” to be done, I would race thru those, doing a “good” job of course…and then out to the sunshine I’d go. 

268_6844

Each day held a new adventure for me. I spent most of my time playing alone, not because I had no one to play with, but because I just seemed to prefer it that way.  After all, I did have my secret hide-outs that no one else could know about.  I remember my favorite one was across the main road, thru the neighbor’s yard, across the road that led to the creek – better known as “the creek road”,   thru the woods…right smack dab in the middle of a circle of huge boulders.  I’m sure they were just large rocks, but to me, at that age, they were definitely boulders.  I would take my “treasures” with me and hide them underneath the rocks.  Some of my “best” treasures were empty “Aunt Jemima” syrup bottles.  I shared many secrets with those little ladies. They may have been empty of syrup, but I filled each one back up with the secret hopes and dreams of a little girl’s heart.  They always listened and accepted what I had to say without hesitation or condition.  And I always made sure the lids were screwed on very tight, so that my secrets would be safe. 

I have thought of those syrup bottles often over the years.  It’s funny how something that might have seemed so very useless to others, could have been such a good friend to a little girl, who’s heart was so full, but who was afraid to share with others for fear of judgment.  I AM very blessed to be at a place in my life now, where I feel free to share what is in my heart with all who choose to hear it.  It is as if those bottles from all those years ago have been divinely opened and the hidden treasures of my heart are finally beginning to pour forth from the safety of their hiding place.

~D~

Photo:  ~D~ Hideout ~ March 2010
Copyright 2010 – Denise Gilreath ©

Blanket of Love

  • Posted on January 7, 2010 at 10:26 pm

Blanket of Love 2It was cold on the Back Porch today so my stay was brief. I stood and watched the snow gently fall. It slowly decorated the trees and covered the frozen ground. There was a peaceful silence as each tiny snowflake reached its destination. Snowflakes are unique, you know. No two are alike and each has its own reason for being. Those that fall first are soon met by those that fall next. One individual snowflake might go unnoticed. But when many snowflakes come together and create a beautiful blanket of Snow…they demand our attention. And so it is with us. Each of us is unique in our own way. Standing alone, we may not be noticed. But if we come together in the Love that we are and gently cover the Earth…the World will stand up and take notice!

~D~ ღ

Photo: Snowy Tree ~ Chattanooga, TN ~ January 2010
Copyright 2010 – Denise Gilreath ©